I’m resurrecting the blog, because Mitch and I are starting on our biggest adventure yet: parenting.
No, I’m not pregnant.
We are starting the process to become foster and adoptive parents. Our ultimate goal is adoption,
but via the foster care system. This has been in the “the future” for a while, but it’s actually in progress
now. We’ve submitted our initial paperwork and started classes.
but via the foster care system. This has been in the “the future” for a while, but it’s actually in progress
now. We’ve submitted our initial paperwork and started classes.
The backstory: On our first date, Mitch said he didn’t want kids, but really loved being an uncle (at the
time he had 2 nephews and 1 niece. Now we’re up to 7 with #8 on the way). Every couples therapist
will tell you the only thing that can’t be solved with a compromise is having kids- you can’t have a half
a kid. I knew I wanted kids someday- so this should have been a deal breaker, but for some reason it
wasn’t. Maybe I didn’t really believe him? After more conversations, we came to the conclusion that
Mitch didn’t want biological kids. He’s had health issues that have strong hereditary links and didn’t
want to pass that on. I had a similar view- when I was 22 I was diagnosed with PolyCystic Ovarian
Syndrome (PCOS). PCOS often causes infertility (though I now know many women with PCOS who
have biological kids), so I decided many years ago that if biological kids weren’t in the cards, I was
totally ok with adopting. Both of us have worked with kids for over 20 years, and I know I have no
problem loving them- I fall in love with so many kids every year. So getting to the point where we
agreed adoption was the option for us wasn’t very difficult. But it was a “someday” kind of thing.
time he had 2 nephews and 1 niece. Now we’re up to 7 with #8 on the way). Every couples therapist
will tell you the only thing that can’t be solved with a compromise is having kids- you can’t have a half
a kid. I knew I wanted kids someday- so this should have been a deal breaker, but for some reason it
wasn’t. Maybe I didn’t really believe him? After more conversations, we came to the conclusion that
Mitch didn’t want biological kids. He’s had health issues that have strong hereditary links and didn’t
want to pass that on. I had a similar view- when I was 22 I was diagnosed with PolyCystic Ovarian
Syndrome (PCOS). PCOS often causes infertility (though I now know many women with PCOS who
have biological kids), so I decided many years ago that if biological kids weren’t in the cards, I was
totally ok with adopting. Both of us have worked with kids for over 20 years, and I know I have no
problem loving them- I fall in love with so many kids every year. So getting to the point where we
agreed adoption was the option for us wasn’t very difficult. But it was a “someday” kind of thing.
I will admit I’ve had the baby fever. I adore all of our nieces and nephews, I love my school kids,
Mitch is incredibly patient and so good with kids- adding a non-bio kid to our family is the least of my
concerns. But we agreed our house was too small, so we decided to expand, and that was a nearly
year long project. Once it was done, we agreed we’d start the process. We didn’t realize the process
would be so fast! We did paperwork and started classes the next week. We have 3 more classes, a
home inspection, and a little bit of paperwork left- and then we’ll be licensed! Realistically we could
have a kid in just a couple of months. It’s exciting and terrifying.
Mitch is incredibly patient and so good with kids- adding a non-bio kid to our family is the least of my
concerns. But we agreed our house was too small, so we decided to expand, and that was a nearly
year long project. Once it was done, we agreed we’d start the process. We didn’t realize the process
would be so fast! We did paperwork and started classes the next week. We have 3 more classes, a
home inspection, and a little bit of paperwork left- and then we’ll be licensed! Realistically we could
have a kid in just a couple of months. It’s exciting and terrifying.
I have so many thoughts and feelings about all of it- and I'm going to do my best to blog them, so
stay tuned for thoughts on classes so far, house prep, and everything else we’re in for. I mean up for.
And share your trips, trials, and tribulations with me! I will need all of them.
stay tuned for thoughts on classes so far, house prep, and everything else we’re in for. I mean up for.
And share your trips, trials, and tribulations with me! I will need all of them.
